Work/Home balancing act

How do you do the work/home life balancing act? Until a little less than four years ago, I was a stay at home mom. Much to my dismay, and horror, I hated being at home alone all day with just an infant to keep me company.

I needed adult conversation. As much as I love my son, and I hate leaving him each morning to go to work and school, I can't help feeling a touch of guilt over choosing to go back to work rather than staying at home with him. For the first 3 years of his life, I went to college in the morning and he went to daycare, but I picked him up by noon. Now, I leave him in the mornings and don't pick him up until 6:30 p.m. or later each evening.

We do have a wonderful babysitter, but I still hate leaving him. I feel like someone else is raising my child and I don't know how to get past it. It doesn't help matters any that he knows I feel guilty and he plays on it every morning with baleful looks and crocodile tears.

So does anyone out there have any suggestions for dealing with leaving my baby (since he is four and a half, he would kick my butt for calling him that, if he could read yet) to go make myself content? I know since starting work and school, I am a much happier person, but a much guiltier one, too.

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