Understanding directions, written or verbal, isn’t for me
I can write a legible sentence every now and then, but don't give me directions to read or anything that has to be put together. My frustration level is intolerable when it comes to directions - verbal or written. I bought a new car three weeks ago. There wasn't really anything wrong with my old car except it was a five-speed with a turbo engine that got its kicks on high-test gas. I had the car for five years and didn't know how to load or unload the CDs the whole time. The salesperson had to unload the CDs and put them in the new car's player.I didn't get another five-speed because it had reached the point where I was forgetting to put the car in first gear at stoplights. The new car has some kind of fancy automatic transmission with different settings. It also has the map system that's supposed to keep you from getting lost. And it has lots of other amenities, including a sunroof that will probably never be used.
I have tried to read the directions regarding the automatic transmission, which can also be operated as a manual. It was a major accomplishment for me just to find the "D" for "Drive." I have no idea what the other settings are for. The car goes forward when I put it in drive, and that's all I'm asking at the time. All I know is one setting is for driving around town, another for the interstate and a third for flying.
The car is also a turbo and much thirstier than the five-speed. So, it was only fair that the price of gas would shoot up to over $3.25 a gallon a day after the new car came home to roost.
I had a mileage thing I could set on the '04 (I bought it in mid-2003) and the odometer was even under the speedometer. I have yet to find the odometer or the thing you set for mileage on the '08. But no need to worry about such piddling matters. All I have to do is look at the gas gauge and watch it drop right through my bifocals.
Morning News Photography Chief John Russell thrives on reading directions. He's figured out the thing on the dash that tells you where you are going. He even got the woman who gives directions talking this morning. But, I'm sorry to report, she had a stroke when she told me to turn right five times and I ignored her. I knew where I was going and she didn't. She will learn before long that she is dealing with a directional derelict who went 100 miles on the right interstate one time only to discover that he was going in the wrong direction. And this directional derelict will only stop to ask directions when he drives off the end of the earth.
The new car has a hookup for satellite radio. I have yet to call to have it hooked up because that's some-thing else I'll have to learn. I need to master setting the buttons on the regular radio before hopping on that satellite. Besides, all I ever listen to is that ultra-liberal drivel on NPR's talk radio. That keeps my blood pressure up, which in turn keeps my mind off worrying about how to operate all the gizmos on the car.
When in doubt one should return to the dealership where the car was purchased. But I doubt I will do that because I won't understand what the salesperson is talking about. That's what children are for. I will send one of my boys with the stipulation that he doesn't take my radio off 88.1. I would have just as hard a time trying to find the station again as I do set-ting my clocks forward and backward each time Day-light Saving arrives and departs.
Posted by on 03/21 at 01:53 PM
I have a friend who’s like you. She doesn’t go to the mall alone because she can’t figure the way out.
Dwight, I know it doesn’t help you one bit when you have to follow me to drive somewhere!
I, too, am directionally challenged when it comes to stuff like hooking up a DVD player. Thank God my kid brother’s an electrical engineer and can either talk me through it or do it for me.
But when I’m driving, I have to get lost on my first try getting somewhere new. After that, I can find my way there with no problems.